Coincidentally after writing the Gentleman's blog a.k.a. the Oompa Loompa, there is a possibility I may have found one! I feel like I found Big Foot! Is this real or is the National Enquirer about to drop photos and scandalous articles with "EXPOSED!" stamped all over it? lol
What shall I name this Possible Oompa Loompa (POL) ? Hmm Let's call him Paul. Get it? POL?Paul.. lmao.. It's so cheesy I crack myself up! ;) I met Paul on a dating site. He's intelligent, funny, witty, a good listener, tall, attractive, in shape, 39, has his own home, a car and a good career, he's a good Greek man. Opa! lol OMG. That's a lot of checks on my check list :).. moving along swiftly... He messaged me, I returned his message we got along great through email, moved to phone conversations where we really clicked and connected. We laughed, we talked, got to know each other. Guys, one thing I noticed right off the bat was when this guy said something, his word was bond. If he said he would text me later, he did. If he said he would call, he did. Every single time without fail. Impressive. That gave me a tremendous sense of security because I didn't have to wonder if he was interested in me, if he was brushing me off, if he lost interest in me...This is called Crazy Prevention guys!!! By being consistent and following through. a sane woman will feel more secure and more at ease therefore settling any potential crazy vibes... Impressive.
We decided to meet tonight to go for dinner and so far, even though I haven't met him, I like this guy so I get dressed to the nines. I even got one of my gay BFF's stamps of approval ;-) (They KNOW more about sexy than most women do and they give the best blow job advice!.. Seriously) Thank God for them! Stone wash Asymmetrical thin form fitting leather jacket, black thin strap top, black shiny spandexy looking tights and satin black high heels. Hair and makeup, done and done! If only I had a camera for the look on his face when I came downstairs lol Priceless. It's rare to watch a guys eyes pop out of their heads but at the same token quite... humbling. I mean, I know I looked good lol. I'm a confident woman but when a woman sees it on a guys face that she wants to impress it makes a sane woman feel really special but not in that "I-think-I'm all -that- and-a bag-of-chips!" kinda way lol. He literally walked right up to me and kissed me on the lips! A nice quick one but enough to catch me off gaurd in a great way. He then walked me to his car, opened the door and helped me into it. Impressed yet again. Wow. I'm expecting Candid Camera to pop up any moment and say " Smile! You're on Candid Caaaamera!" lol Is this for real?? I sure hope so...
We were originally on our way to a restaurant that I had selected when we were about to drive past one he's been to and he asks if I've ever been and I say no. He tells me how great the food is etc so I say, "Do you want to go there? I don't mind.." and he says "Ok, you're gonna love it! It's high end and a real classy place." I have to admit he was right. He walks around the car to open my door, he holds my hand briefly leading up to the restaurant, he opens all the doors, he knows the staff through work related business, he lets me follow the host, he waits for me to be seated.. Holy crap! I mean if I didn't know better I'd SWEAR he read my blog! lol. The place is beautiful. Looks like an old renovated mansion but with old school decor. Stained glass portions in wood, huge chandeliers, beautiful china. Gorgeous.Throughout dinner we talk and every now and then a server that knows him comes to talk to him and they exchange pleasantries and I watch the interaction. He never talks down to anyone, he's never dismissive towards any of them, he says please, thank you and excuse me. He asks about business, their families etc. Most women might mind this but I don't. I recognize that this is part of his career in terms of maintaining relationships and sometimes business and pleasure mix. It happens in my own industry all the time so I'm quite patient. I also don't mind because it allows me to watch how he treats people. When he asks about wives and kids he is genuine. It's not just small talk to him. Again I'm impressed. I swear a 3rd eye is going to pop out any minute now!... How about NOW?! An extra arm maybe? No?.. or could this be the real deal??
We talk, get to know each other more and he's open, honest, curious about me and listens well. Every now then he touches my leg or arm and a couple times just leans over and kisses me gently ( we're sitting side by side) . He's definitely making it known he's into me. Anyway, we continue with our lavish meals, drinks and dessert. I order a Spanish coffee and I get the show of my life! The server comes with a whole cart containing fresh whipped cream, a couple of shots of Tia Maria for the coffee, a plate of sugar and this burner. It looks like a huge Bunsen Burner. He wets the glass, dips it sugar and lights the thing on fire by turning it over the fire! The fire fills the cup and is a cobalt blue and he keeps turning it. He then lights the shot of Tia Maria in a small metal dish and proceeds to get it really heated up before he pours it into the glass. As he's pouring it looks like pure blue flaming liquid going into the blue flaming glass! Unbelievably amazing to watch! I wish I could remember what it was called! I was in shock lol.. I thought I was just getting a liitle coffee with alcohol and whip cream but instead I got this incredible show! First date to remember for both of us! After our fantastic meal he takes me home. He gives me a much longer good night kiss. The kind that tells you the sex is going to be crazy hot with him... one day. Not tonight because this guy's a gentleman. We've already established with each other the fact that we're both very interested in each other and obviously very sexually attracted but it's better to wait. He actually said " I'm really glad you didn't invite me back to your place because if anything had happened so early I probably would've lost interest. I like the chase." Lol.. Is this guy for real?? Is this a Big Foot sighting?? I thanked him for an amazing night. The dinner, the atmosphere and most of his company. He walked me to my lobby and watched me get into the elevator. Honestly guys, he nailed ALL of my First Date DO's, never hit a single DON'T and so far he embodies what a gentleman is. If he set out to impress me, then consider the BFW officially floored and recuperating :-o !!! Lol ( Don't worry guys it won't interrupt the One Night Stand Blog ;).. It's almost ready to be published.lol)
Stay tuned faithful BFW followers.. I'll keep you posted on POL who knows, maybe on the next date we'll go to the beach and he'll casually walk on water for me! At this point you never know lol ..
Monday 10 September 2012
Tuesday 4 September 2012
Being a Gentlemen a.k.a. The Mysterious Oompa Loompa's
Here's the deal guys... Gentlemen are becoming extinct! I've had a few women read my blogs and when they finish laughing one of the first things they ask me to talk to you guys about is being a gentleman. The Gentleman seems to be a rare and dying or hidden breed of man! They're like Oompa Loompa's! We can't figure out where the heck they're hiding! And trust me we have checked under a lot of rocks and have waded through some pretty crappy ponds but no luck! Oly Oly Oxen Free guys! lol The thing is the men are completely unaware of the standards they're measured up to and what kind of expectations the woman might have, not just from you but any man. So in order to find this out I started with...What is the definition of a Gentleman from a woman's perspective? In knowing this, you might come to understand what most respectable women measure men by. First I started looking for the literal sense of the word but in today's day it was so outdated it was ridiculous! Something about noble birth and superior social position blah blah, ummm ya right so for the modern day version I turned to Urban Dictionary and chose the answer I thought best reflected what a woman's perspective would be:
Being a Gentleman isn't just about how you treat women but everyone! For example:
I was on the transit the other day and a blind man got on the bus and asked if anyone could give him a seat.. Not one man got up however three women including myself attempted to offer their seat! Obviously he took the one closest to him but do you know what he said that really opened my eyes guys?? He said, "It's always the women." :-o !!! Shame! He then proceeded to hit on her in a somewhat funny yet creepy way but that's besides the point lol.
Guys!! Seriously?! What's going on? It's one thing to grumble about picking up a cheque but you guys don't even give the blind man a seat?? We need to work this out!
Here's a great example of a real Gentleman :
The other day I asked a friend if she wanted to get some dinner...Let's call her Jessica. She told me to hold on a sec, came back and invited me to go out with her and a friend visiting from Florida. He's a work colleague and he flies in for business here and there so when he comes into town they hang out... Let's call him John. I ask her if the restaurant takes debit and she says yes. Great! John picks us up and we head down to the restaurant John has selected. We had a great time! We talked, we laughed, we ate, we drank. Now my friend, she's single, intelligent, successful, younger than I am but nonetheless single like me so she has experienced similar dating woes. John is also successful, intelligent and married. We talk about his wife and he really loves her! After many years of marriage he still loves this woman deeply. He would give her the world on a platter if he could. I'm impressed. When the server comes he always let's us order first or let's us ask a million and one questions without even a blink of the eye. He is a patient man. One that has learned to deal with women through patience ... a lot of patience lol. Again I'm impressed. Throughout the conversation and dinner though I become aware of a guy sitting at a table next to us and naturally start to compare. John I believe is in his 40's or 50's, clean business professional haircut, great shape hasn't let himself go one bit. Casual dress shirt, no wrinkles. The guy beside him whom I think was on a date, DEFINITELY single, 30ish, had on a wrinkled shirt with a stain or two, lacked table manners and had a pot belly that needed it's own table. Folks if you wanna be plus size do your thing but wear it well! I say the same to the skinny minis! Just because you're slim doesn't mean I need to see your belly all the time! John is freaking married and STILL takes the time to keep himself looking good. Most guys after 30 don't (sad but true). Anyway I digress... I was basically marveling at the fact that the married man that has a wife still puts in the effort to keep himself looking good while the single guy clearly stopped caring long ago. After dinner and dessert the bill came and I pulled out my debit card to pay for my meal. Before I could, John was handling the bill. Bowled over impressed! Oh. My. God. It's a freaking Oompa Loompa!!! Live and in person!! They exist! Now.. where do I go to order my own? Single version please! Is there a special form? Secret password? Do I need to pop a pill?! Oh, tell me great Obi-Wan Kenobi! lol
You're probably thinking I'm more impressed by the fact that he took care of dinner right? I'd be lying if I didn't admit that ya, that was awesome... but it wasn't just that. It was that he truly embodied what a Gentleman was all about. He was polite, courteous, fun, entertaining, charming, treated us with respect, held open doors, allowed us to walk in front of him towards the table, picked us up and dropped us off AND he paid the bill.. and expected nothing in return. The married guy treated us with more class, respect, patience and manners than any single guy has in a long time! The guy should teach Ooompa Loompa 101 lol. His wife is lucky and I hope she realizes it :) .
Are you ready?? Here comes another tale from the BF Whisperers Tales of Dating Doom:
Sooo, I met this guy online. French, 40, slim, average looking, intelligent, Accountant. I should've known when I heard he was an Accountant lol *shaking my head* ...No offense guys!! He picks me up in a massive van and at first I'm thinking... "Um, do I really want to get in there??" He leans over to open the door (would've been better if he got out of the car to open the door ;) ) and when I open it, I peek in to verify there are no crazy axe murdering rapists in the back and when it's all clear I hop in. I instantly notice that the van has a faint B.O. (body odour) smell and I think "Oh God it's Eau de Pepe Le Pew! Ewww" (Hygenie gentlemen! Lol) But he's French so I'm trying to look past it! (oh stop! you know you were thinking it, I'm just bold enough to say it!) We decide to get Sushi. I love Sushi! Yay! We look at the menu and he starts asking if I tried this or that and I say yes and no accordingly. I'm in the mood for soft shell crab so that's what I order. He orders at least 5 dishes and encourages me to try a bit of each one. Now guys, I'm a small eater. I still eat kid's meals at fast food restaurants when I go and I mean Canadian size kids meals which are much smaller than American kid's meals so basically I take a bite or 2 of each dish but nothing more because I really can't handle it! Throughout the date we get to talking and I find out that he's not 40.. .but 52... 5 years younger than my mom at the time! Really? Really. Sorry guys, I like some freaky stuff sometimes but a guy old enough to be my daddy?... that's just to much freak for my little show! I stick around though because I'm polite, I'm a lady... and I was curious to see how much worse Pepe Le Pew was gonna get lol.
I didn't have to wait for long because when the cheque came he grabbed it, calculated it and told me EXACTLY how much my half of the bill was to the penny, oh yes I paid for half of the 5 dishes he ordered and the icing on the cake was when he said "I'll be a gentleman and pay the tip." And I looked at this man and realized he honestly thought he was doing me a favor! Lmao! Well you guys know me by now, I paid my half but I decided he at least owed me a ride home. And now folks, we come to my favorite part of the evening! He pulls up to the driveway of my building and starts to head toward the Visitor's parking lot. I ask him "Um, where are you going?" He looks at me with the most confused expression and said "I thought I was coming up to your place." Whaaaaat????! Guys?? I laughed so hard tears started streaming down my face! I mean.. Are you kidding me?? Pepe Le Pew with his cheap, lying, manipulative, stinky little self thought he was making his way back to my place? To get laid?? I mean what planet did this ape grow on?? I had to point toward the front of the building because I was still having trouble speaking through my laughter! I opened the door, got out, looked at his confused little face and thanked him for the ride home and nothing else. There was nothing else to thank him for! His number was deleted before I got to the elevator.
There was absolutely nothing gentlemanly about this guy! Guys take notes! When you go out on dates with women being a Gentleman shouldn't be an outfit you put on. As in it shouldn't be just to impress her. It should be about you, it should be who you are! Being a Gentleman is about having manners, being polite, treating dates, girlfriends, wives, wait staff, colleagues, people in general with respect and common courtesy! When was the last time you offered a pregnant woman your seat? When was the last time you helped a mother carry her stroller down the stairs? Offered to carry an old ladies groceries for her? Helped your mother, father, family member for no other reason than because they asked for your help? Treated a woman to dinner without the expectation that she owes you something for that meal?? Just for a few minutes I'd like you to honestly consider it.. :) And guys, if you're daddies, you really need to start stepping up to the plate and teaching your sons these things. Teach him not only how to be a man but to how to be a Gentleman because somewhere there is a disconnect and men today can't compare to the old school men of the past. The generation born in 70's on...Yup, this blog is mostly for you.
I believe we hold you guys to this standard because our father's and uncles are old school. This is what we expect because this is what we saw, this how we were taught a man should treat us. And if it's not them, I won't lie it's the RomCom's lol. Guys... if only you understood what a goldmine that is towards understanding what women want and what they expect. It's not a multimillion dollar industry for no reason! Open your eyes! We'll cover Romance in a future blog ;)
Gentlemen's Dating Cheat Sheet
1. Follow my First Date Do's and Don'ts Blog
2. Open doors, pull out chairs
3. Be polite
4. Be aware of your manners
5. Let her walk in front of you through doors or on the way to a table and let her choose what seat she wants to sit in. Whether she wants to sit in or out
6. Take initiative - choose a place or something to do keeping in mind things she likes! Don't leave everything up to her. If you're unsure ask her opinion but don't make it entirely her choice
7. Pay the bill
8. Make sure she gets home safely
9. Actions speak louder than words so only say you'll do something if you plan on doing it
10. Seriously read the do's and don'ts.. :)
In general guys, being a Gentleman shouldn't be a temporary thing, not just something you do for a few hours a night sometimes! It should be who you are all the time. At home, at work, with friends, family or dates. Often some of you start as Gentlemen and once the woman falls for you it stops! Why?? Now that she's with you she doesn't deserve to still be treated like a lady?? Lol come on guys! It sends a bad message! You're not ALL assholes! I have faith in you guys... well at least some of you! lol. You too can be some woman's Oompa Loompa lol! Why wouldn't you want to be a better man today than you were yesterday? :)
Oh and I almost forgot.. Allo and Guten Tag to my German friends, Zdravstvuj to my Russian friends, Hallo to my friends in the Netherlands and Welcome my new friends in the UK!! :D
Until next time folks :) .... I think my next blog will be about one night stands.. We definitely need to talk about that! lol ;)
"Something very rare today. A man who is respectful and considerate of
those around him. Acts politely. Treats women with respect. Open doors
for them, pulls out chairs, and is classy. What more guys should be."
Being a Gentleman isn't just about how you treat women but everyone! For example:
I was on the transit the other day and a blind man got on the bus and asked if anyone could give him a seat.. Not one man got up however three women including myself attempted to offer their seat! Obviously he took the one closest to him but do you know what he said that really opened my eyes guys?? He said, "It's always the women." :-o !!! Shame! He then proceeded to hit on her in a somewhat funny yet creepy way but that's besides the point lol.
Guys!! Seriously?! What's going on? It's one thing to grumble about picking up a cheque but you guys don't even give the blind man a seat?? We need to work this out!
Here's a great example of a real Gentleman :
The other day I asked a friend if she wanted to get some dinner...Let's call her Jessica. She told me to hold on a sec, came back and invited me to go out with her and a friend visiting from Florida. He's a work colleague and he flies in for business here and there so when he comes into town they hang out... Let's call him John. I ask her if the restaurant takes debit and she says yes. Great! John picks us up and we head down to the restaurant John has selected. We had a great time! We talked, we laughed, we ate, we drank. Now my friend, she's single, intelligent, successful, younger than I am but nonetheless single like me so she has experienced similar dating woes. John is also successful, intelligent and married. We talk about his wife and he really loves her! After many years of marriage he still loves this woman deeply. He would give her the world on a platter if he could. I'm impressed. When the server comes he always let's us order first or let's us ask a million and one questions without even a blink of the eye. He is a patient man. One that has learned to deal with women through patience ... a lot of patience lol. Again I'm impressed. Throughout the conversation and dinner though I become aware of a guy sitting at a table next to us and naturally start to compare. John I believe is in his 40's or 50's, clean business professional haircut, great shape hasn't let himself go one bit. Casual dress shirt, no wrinkles. The guy beside him whom I think was on a date, DEFINITELY single, 30ish, had on a wrinkled shirt with a stain or two, lacked table manners and had a pot belly that needed it's own table. Folks if you wanna be plus size do your thing but wear it well! I say the same to the skinny minis! Just because you're slim doesn't mean I need to see your belly all the time! John is freaking married and STILL takes the time to keep himself looking good. Most guys after 30 don't (sad but true). Anyway I digress... I was basically marveling at the fact that the married man that has a wife still puts in the effort to keep himself looking good while the single guy clearly stopped caring long ago. After dinner and dessert the bill came and I pulled out my debit card to pay for my meal. Before I could, John was handling the bill. Bowled over impressed! Oh. My. God. It's a freaking Oompa Loompa!!! Live and in person!! They exist! Now.. where do I go to order my own? Single version please! Is there a special form? Secret password? Do I need to pop a pill?! Oh, tell me great Obi-Wan Kenobi! lol
You're probably thinking I'm more impressed by the fact that he took care of dinner right? I'd be lying if I didn't admit that ya, that was awesome... but it wasn't just that. It was that he truly embodied what a Gentleman was all about. He was polite, courteous, fun, entertaining, charming, treated us with respect, held open doors, allowed us to walk in front of him towards the table, picked us up and dropped us off AND he paid the bill.. and expected nothing in return. The married guy treated us with more class, respect, patience and manners than any single guy has in a long time! The guy should teach Ooompa Loompa 101 lol. His wife is lucky and I hope she realizes it :) .
Are you ready?? Here comes another tale from the BF Whisperers Tales of Dating Doom:
Sooo, I met this guy online. French, 40, slim, average looking, intelligent, Accountant. I should've known when I heard he was an Accountant lol *shaking my head* ...No offense guys!! He picks me up in a massive van and at first I'm thinking... "Um, do I really want to get in there??" He leans over to open the door (would've been better if he got out of the car to open the door ;) ) and when I open it, I peek in to verify there are no crazy axe murdering rapists in the back and when it's all clear I hop in. I instantly notice that the van has a faint B.O. (body odour) smell and I think "Oh God it's Eau de Pepe Le Pew! Ewww" (Hygenie gentlemen! Lol) But he's French so I'm trying to look past it! (oh stop! you know you were thinking it, I'm just bold enough to say it!) We decide to get Sushi. I love Sushi! Yay! We look at the menu and he starts asking if I tried this or that and I say yes and no accordingly. I'm in the mood for soft shell crab so that's what I order. He orders at least 5 dishes and encourages me to try a bit of each one. Now guys, I'm a small eater. I still eat kid's meals at fast food restaurants when I go and I mean Canadian size kids meals which are much smaller than American kid's meals so basically I take a bite or 2 of each dish but nothing more because I really can't handle it! Throughout the date we get to talking and I find out that he's not 40.. .but 52... 5 years younger than my mom at the time! Really? Really. Sorry guys, I like some freaky stuff sometimes but a guy old enough to be my daddy?... that's just to much freak for my little show! I stick around though because I'm polite, I'm a lady... and I was curious to see how much worse Pepe Le Pew was gonna get lol.
I didn't have to wait for long because when the cheque came he grabbed it, calculated it and told me EXACTLY how much my half of the bill was to the penny, oh yes I paid for half of the 5 dishes he ordered and the icing on the cake was when he said "I'll be a gentleman and pay the tip." And I looked at this man and realized he honestly thought he was doing me a favor! Lmao! Well you guys know me by now, I paid my half but I decided he at least owed me a ride home. And now folks, we come to my favorite part of the evening! He pulls up to the driveway of my building and starts to head toward the Visitor's parking lot. I ask him "Um, where are you going?" He looks at me with the most confused expression and said "I thought I was coming up to your place." Whaaaaat????! Guys?? I laughed so hard tears started streaming down my face! I mean.. Are you kidding me?? Pepe Le Pew with his cheap, lying, manipulative, stinky little self thought he was making his way back to my place? To get laid?? I mean what planet did this ape grow on?? I had to point toward the front of the building because I was still having trouble speaking through my laughter! I opened the door, got out, looked at his confused little face and thanked him for the ride home and nothing else. There was nothing else to thank him for! His number was deleted before I got to the elevator.
There was absolutely nothing gentlemanly about this guy! Guys take notes! When you go out on dates with women being a Gentleman shouldn't be an outfit you put on. As in it shouldn't be just to impress her. It should be about you, it should be who you are! Being a Gentleman is about having manners, being polite, treating dates, girlfriends, wives, wait staff, colleagues, people in general with respect and common courtesy! When was the last time you offered a pregnant woman your seat? When was the last time you helped a mother carry her stroller down the stairs? Offered to carry an old ladies groceries for her? Helped your mother, father, family member for no other reason than because they asked for your help? Treated a woman to dinner without the expectation that she owes you something for that meal?? Just for a few minutes I'd like you to honestly consider it.. :) And guys, if you're daddies, you really need to start stepping up to the plate and teaching your sons these things. Teach him not only how to be a man but to how to be a Gentleman because somewhere there is a disconnect and men today can't compare to the old school men of the past. The generation born in 70's on...Yup, this blog is mostly for you.
I believe we hold you guys to this standard because our father's and uncles are old school. This is what we expect because this is what we saw, this how we were taught a man should treat us. And if it's not them, I won't lie it's the RomCom's lol. Guys... if only you understood what a goldmine that is towards understanding what women want and what they expect. It's not a multimillion dollar industry for no reason! Open your eyes! We'll cover Romance in a future blog ;)
Gentlemen's Dating Cheat Sheet
1. Follow my First Date Do's and Don'ts Blog
2. Open doors, pull out chairs
3. Be polite
4. Be aware of your manners
5. Let her walk in front of you through doors or on the way to a table and let her choose what seat she wants to sit in. Whether she wants to sit in or out
6. Take initiative - choose a place or something to do keeping in mind things she likes! Don't leave everything up to her. If you're unsure ask her opinion but don't make it entirely her choice
7. Pay the bill
8. Make sure she gets home safely
9. Actions speak louder than words so only say you'll do something if you plan on doing it
10. Seriously read the do's and don'ts.. :)
In general guys, being a Gentleman shouldn't be a temporary thing, not just something you do for a few hours a night sometimes! It should be who you are all the time. At home, at work, with friends, family or dates. Often some of you start as Gentlemen and once the woman falls for you it stops! Why?? Now that she's with you she doesn't deserve to still be treated like a lady?? Lol come on guys! It sends a bad message! You're not ALL assholes! I have faith in you guys... well at least some of you! lol. You too can be some woman's Oompa Loompa lol! Why wouldn't you want to be a better man today than you were yesterday? :)
Oh and I almost forgot.. Allo and Guten Tag to my German friends, Zdravstvuj to my Russian friends, Hallo to my friends in the Netherlands and Welcome my new friends in the UK!! :D
Until next time folks :) .... I think my next blog will be about one night stands.. We definitely need to talk about that! lol ;)
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