Welcome to ...INTERNET DATING!!!! lol
For those of you guys saying "whatever I don't need the internet to pick up women!" When you think about it, it's a logical step in the world of technology! We have 3D tv, iPhones, cars with cameras to help you reverse... so why not dating through the internet? Look at it as a virtual bar! Don't take it to seriously but it expands your options! There are tons of dating sites, some are paid some are free. Pick one or two and check them out. What kind of people are there? Do you see a few women that pique your interest? If so sign up! What have you got to lose? Keep it safe, screen the emails and voila! You've just moseyed into the virtual bar!
Here are some of my tips for internet dating:
1. Profiles.. Fill them out! This is the time to introduce yourself, talk about things you like/don't like, what you're looking for and to tell them a bit about your personality. Quite a few people start off their profiles with "I dunno what to say, it's so hard to talk about myself here".. really??? Because you have no problem talking about yourself in person! Just start typing as if you were talking! Also don't just say " hey I hate filling out these things but feel free to ask me anything you like." This is both a very lazy and negative statement. If people are already internet dating it's because time is of the essence. Why do you think they have time to sit down and ask you questions about yourself in which the answers should already be in your profile? And lets not forget it's you plus a million other guys saying the same thing! It doesn't have to be a book but keep it fun, unique, and looking like you genuinely want to meet someone. Women will reply to that more so than "I hate filling out these things."
2. Pictures. Extremely important! Most online profiles actually have the option to not receive emails from people without pics, it's that important. Upload 3-5 shots at the very minimum. At least one clear head shot where you're smiling and facing the camera not the side of your face. One upper body shot and one full length shot. Why? Because she wants to know what your face looks like! Do you have nice teeth, do you have nice eyes hence the head shot. Upper body is good because it gives a good idea from the waist up how you look from a short distance. Full length shot gives the idea of what you look like overall. Make sure that the head or upper body shot does not contain a shadow, is not blurry, and you're not wearing either a hat or sunglasses...why?? Because they block your face! Is she looking to date you or the hat that's covering half of your face?? lol Come on guys let's be real!! Let me guess.. some of you are saying but it's a style!! Ya well she can see that style in a full length shot or in person! Try to avoid goofy pics. Most of the time guys think these pics are funny and show their "fun side" but to a woman most of those pics translate as ridiculous or unattractive next thing you know she's clicked on the next profile. Don't worry guys you'll have plenty of time later to show her this side of you! Make sure the area is well lit and preferably get someone else to take the pic for you. Many women seem to not like self shot pics. Now I don't always agree with this one but I have seen many women complain about it( I don't know why!!) but I'm putting this out there for them. Please keep your shirt on! lol Literally. I've seen a lot of women complain about to many shirtless pics! Personally I'm of the belief that if you have a nice body rock it out! I never mind seeing a nice set of abs but hey some do so there you go lol. Last but not least.. Make sure the pic is recent. As in within the last 3 months. NO ONE likes the shocker when their date shows up and they're 100 lbs heavier and 10 years older than their pics!! :-o !!! Not cool! Whatever you are, BE HONEST about it.
3.Contact. So at some point you start reading profiles looking at pics and decide "hey this girl looks cute, I like what she has to say I'll send her a message." For God's sake men say something worth responding too!! Say more than one or two words rather than just saying Hi or how're you... there are 10 other guys that have already messaged her the same thing! She often won't bother replying. Be polite but brief. " Hi.. I came across your profile and you seem really_______ ( funny, sweet, interesting, intelligent etc) when you have a minute take a look at my profile and if you're interested in getting to know each other I'd love to hear back from you! Thanks_____ (insert your name). What does this say? It means you took the time to read about her not just look at her pics, it shows you have manners and can speak politely and respectfully ( women love gentlemen), and you commented on HER and not how she looks. 9 times out of ten men shoot themselves in the foot by commenting on her looks first. Does that mean never say she's pretty or attractive? No. Just don't make it the first thing. If women think you're just talking to them because you like her ass or their breasts you're dead in the water lol. They don't like being objectified. Most sane, intelligent attractive women want a man that sees what's between her ears and values it as much as he values her smokin body ;) get it? Now does this mean it will always work? Nope. But you're more likely to get a response than if you continue using one or two words. And PLEASE spell out your words!! These U R CUTE messages. I don't care how intelligent you are but it looks like you're dense when you send a message like this. How much time does it save you to leave out a couple of letters?? Take a minute and type the message using real words not fictitious lazy attempts at words.
4. Texting/Calling. If you have gotten to this step Congratulations! You've made a connection! Keep the texting brief but polite! Simply because so many messages lose their translation. How many times have you sent what you thought was a funny message only for the person to be upset, confused or mad? Right. Keep it simple. Calling is very important. Often you can hear things that turn you off or on just by listening to the person's voice, the way they speak, the sound, and their ability to hold a conversation. you'll be surprised how much you can learn by a voice and this will do one of two things. Either you'll feel more encouraged to meet the person or you'll be glad you didn't and saved yourself the time and money lol.
5. Meeting. Guys I have to say... I don't believe in coffee dates. Meeting the person for the first time is all about first impressions! As a woman I'm not going to get myself all dolled up to sit in front of a Starbuck's. it's an absolute waste of time. And I'm going to say it, and some of you won't like it but... it's just plain cheap!! Some of you are pissed now because cheap people don't like being called cheap ( unless you're a recovering addict of any kind--you get a free pass! :) ) but that's the truth of the matter. If you're really interested in a woman do something nice! That doesn't mean you have to break the bank either! Meet for a drink- yes an alcoholic beverage! IF you guys get along share an appetizer :). If she's a vegan or non-drinker source out a nice vegan cafe where you can get a nice pastry or dessert or something ( she'll love that because it shows you're listening to her, you're taking her into consideration, and you care to impress her) . Or a nice coffee place that's more than just a coffee place! For example, here in Toronto there's a great cafe in the downtown core called Snakes and Lattes where you can go get a coffee while playing any one of their over 1000 board games! It's fun, unique, very affordable and a great way to get to know someone :).
6. What to wear. Dress appropriately. How many dates have I been on where the guy just wasn't dressed properly?? Here's a check list:
- Shirt/pants ironed? - no one likes when a man looks like he's crawled out of a laundry basket lol
- Teeth brushed? No one likes bad breath. Make sure to brush your teeth just BEFORE you go on your date.
- Stain free? Please make sure all your clothing is clean and free of stains.
- Hygiene? Shower, shave, deodorant, clean under the nails, ears, shampoo hair, toe nails trimmed and clean looking if you're wearing sandles and don't think she won't notice! I know what you're saying... Are you serious?? Deadly. A lot of men forget to do one or more of these things believe it or not lol.
- Breath Mints or gum? Always have some on you just in case you eat or drink something that alters your breath. If your breath smells bad at all you can KISS your good night kiss goodbye.. cheesy pun intended :p lol
- If you have a beard make sure it's properly trimmed or well maintained.. if you're not sure ask another woman that's not your mother, sister or family.
- Same goes for your hairstyle whatever it may be keep it clean looking.
Remember, when it comes to internet dating, your profile and your pics are your selling tools. So take the time to make it reflect who you are as best as possible. What you're aiming to do is get women interested enough in your profile to stay on your page and email you instead of clicking NEXT! When it's done, if you're still not sure ask a good female friend to review it and give you some HONEST, helpful advice.
Those are my tips for internet dating! I hope they help! Please feel free to ask questions, post comments etc. Good Luck and stay tuned for my next post! :)
